My Friend…

I know my words are going to come of as blasphemous to some of you and for that I apologize if I step on any toes… but this is where my heart is right now. My friend may not have been perfect but she was a good woman with a kind heart that loved her family and her kids above anything. I know everyone will say it was part of God’s plan but I can’t believe that, to take a mother from her kids… I wont believe that, not it this way… I don’t know all the details behind why my friend is gone from this earth but I am angry and sad… Angry mostly at myself for not doing more to show her that I was still there for her, the last time I saw her I saw her wasn’t under the best circumstances and I wish I could just put my arms around her now and say I’m sorry… I’m not saying we fought or anything else but life is way to short for some things. Those of you that knew me and Helen know how much I love her… I miss my friend so much its hard to keep my words cohesive… I can’t really think of anything else to say so I will just leave this note with one of my favorite memories with Helen. It was at the National Drill Classic… she was the drill team commander but compaired to the other schools our drill team was kind of like the bad news bears, most of the other schools had money so they had brand new uniforms while Fairmonts were faded… (I know yall remember them pickle suits) I don’t think any of them were faded to the same shade of Green. I remember before we went on Helen came to me literally shaking and was saying she didn’t know if she could get out there and be the drill team commander… she was so scared… she wanted to quit and walk away. I told her she would be fine and that she had the easiest job of anyone out there… all she had to do was give the commands.. Well when Helen got out on the drill floor you couldn’t see one hint of the fear she had when we were talking… She stepped out bold like she was the baddest person there… She reported to the judge and when she was done she cut her eyes at him in a way that only Helen could. The she proceeded to take the drill team thru their exhibition, and she gave it everything she had and you could see it show thru the entire drill team. Well we waited hours to get the results and they started to announce the winners… 3rd place… not us… oh well we gave it everything we had… the other schools had money so you know it was no big deal… 2nd Place… the Drill team we thought should have won first… but you know it was no big deal… we definitely knew we didn’t win now… we were just sitting back waiting to go home… and then they annouced first place… The Hornets…. Fairmont Heights I don’t think anyone in our section moved… I think we thought it was another Fairmont Heights… hell thinking back that pause seems long as hell… then someone said thats us…And our section exploded… Helen ran down the bleachers and stood up there just beaming… Thats my friend thats the Helen I will always remember her standing there accepting the first place trophy on behalf of her drill team… You will always be in my heart… I love you Helen!!